By Tim Barkley. March 2026.
Q: My spouse just died. What do I need to think about?
A: I’m so sorry to hear. You need to contact his life insurance and retirement benefits administrators, and claim any benefits due you, including rolling over his 401(k) or IRA to a “spousal inherited IRA” or 401(k). You need to check titling on all accounts and assets. Anything just in your spouse’s name – usual culprits are vehicles and bank or investment accounts – needs to be transferred through the probate process. Review your beneficiary designations and remove your spouse as beneficiary. You should review your will, trust, powers of attorney and medical directives to see if you need to change the persons named as executor, trustee, agent, etc. The simple fact that your spouse is named first isn’t a problem as long as the first successor named can produce your spouse’s death certificate. If that’s distasteful, a simple amendment of the will or trust, or a new power of attorney, might be indicated.
Q: I named my four children as POD on my bank accounts. Is there anything else I need to think about?
A: Talk to your bank. Sometimes all four children need to be present when the accounts are claimed. If that’s not possible, an absent child can often provide a letter authorizing mailing of their share of the account. If your children just don’t get along, it might be a problem requiring them to cooperate in the claiming of funds, so consider a trust or naming different children as beneficiaries on different accounts.
Q: Do I need to tell my children what is going to happen when I die?
A: Some people are very private, and other families are very open. If your children do not know now what will happen with you and your assets at the end of your life, that can create conflict. Sometimes children in that situation accuse others of manipulating you or forging documents; but sometimes children told now about your plans can take out their angst on you. Often a “side letter” dated well in advance of your demise can demonstrate, at least, that your intentions were long-standing and thought out well in advance. Ultimately it’s your money and your life and you can choose, but consider carefully how you can make your passing easier for your loved ones.
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Attorney Tim Barkley
The Tim Barkley Law Offices
One Park Avenue
P.O. Box 1136
Mount Airy
Maryland 21771
(301) 829-3778
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